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Maybe its just me?
Couldn't you believe?

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Ruth Arriola, 092792. Call me Ruth. Im 18 years old. Licensed. Im Undescribable. Even i cant Describe myself. but hey, i dont bite. follow me. and ill follow you yah? My Life's happy and sometimes its just shit that happens. I mean wwho doesnt get emo at times? haha. Its a blog kinda like my Timeline while im not tired of the massive transformation of the technology

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©Glamouresque.
Sunday, December 20, 2009
i'll get through this

so my ipod is on shuffle, idk why is my ipod playing these slow jams.

i dont know where to start, so lemme just say it randomly.

first off, i just wanted to say thank you for helping me get over from what happened in the past. like, freals, i wanted to get out of that feeeling, and u helped me through out. i didnt know that i’ll take these things seriously, and i wasnt expecting myself to fall so deep for you. when i say fall so deep? i mean, i cant get up. idknow how am i gonna get through this. but i know i will, it just a matter of time. i believe that this relationship happened for a reason and theres a reason too, why did not work out. like u said, “were two different people” but ive always believed that “opposite attracts”. guess its not true. You made me feeeeel so fucken goooood for 1 month or so. even when were just talking? those were the happppiest days of my life, that it came to the point that i wanted to be forever. and then bam! shit happened and ur feelings changed, but still, i was right there, stayed in love with you.

“I just fell out of love for you” u dont know how much these words hurt me when u said that. i felt like letting go of your hand, but no, i held on, because i still belive in us. the expectation of being together,and working it out. it did not happened. i stepped on my pride, i gave you my all that it came to the point i had nothing left for myself. taking risks just to see you, leaving me behind while im always there for you. treating you the best way i could ever think of..

NOW playing: One Last Cry- Brian Mcknight.

hopefully, this will be the last time i’ll ever cry offa you. Numerous nights, i think of you and cry because of you. You dont know anything about how i feel for you. You dont know how i go through everyday thinking that u fell out of love for you. Thinking of ways to make u fall in love with me again is not easy as it sounds. Leaving me aside,when ur friends are there, i play it cool just to make u happpy, because i know that i cud never make u happy again.

Checking your phone everyday, asking you questions? well sorry for the fact that i just want you by myself, whats so hard about understanding this fact. Well, u dont have to worry about that. U have the freedom that u want. im sorry for what happened. it was all my fault because i was so selfish.

dont tell me you want to take it back because u know u like it this way. u proved that to me with the how you treated me infront of you ex. “what the fuck is your problem dude” a fucken wow. thats what i wasnt expecting from someone i love.

anyways, im getting to the end.

I just wanted to say thank you. i know ive said this hella times before. but thank you, you made me learn things. i dont needa name each of it, because i already told you. thanks a lot.

secondly, i jsut wanted to say sorry. sorry for making you feel like shit. making you feel like this and that.for making you feel all the negative feelings you could feel. im sorry that this relationship didnt work out like what we expected. i truly am sorry.

NOw playing: Only Hope- Mandy Moore.

Youre all that i ever wanted, youre all that i ever wanted to love. i gave you my all. thankyou for this experience. ill never forget this. ill be over you somehow.

i love you. goodbye.
But baby, where they knock you down and out
Is where you oughta stay