Maybe its just me? Couldn't you believe?
Profile HOME Ruth Arriola, 092792. Call me Ruth. Im 18 years old. Licensed. Im Undescribable. Even i cant Describe myself. but hey, i dont bite. follow me. and ill follow you yah? My Life's happy and sometimes its just shit that happens. I mean wwho doesnt get emo at times? haha. Its a blog kinda like my Timeline while im not tired of the massive transformation of the technology Archives March 2009 April 2009 May 2009 June 2009 July 2009 August 2009 September 2009 October 2009 November 2009 December 2009 January 2010 February 2010 March 2010 April 2010 May 2010 June 2010 July 2010 August 2010 September 2010 October 2010 December 2010 January 2012 Exits Allure Bloom Crane Denotation Enigmatism Flair Grace Hope Initiation Credits ©Glamouresque.	Sunday, January 24, 2010 thought its unexplainable,ya know, those typa lesson in life thang that seems to go round and round and den it stopped, and that's where you know u have to really stop. there are some things in life that aren't meant to be. don't cry bcuhs its over, smile bcus it happened. move on becus apparently that person isn't God what made for you. there are some people that you think its meant for you, but its not. don't force it. maybe the kismet is just dancing with you. learn from it,move on and be happy.there's so much reasons to smile for. -ruth a jan 21,2010. 1250am Saturday, January 23, 2010 i know, it took forever. boooo, finally I get to blog,oh gaaaahh, its been a whilee tho. I survived SAT's, the tons of essay due this last week,the chemistry quiz. ooh gasssh, it was really stressful +this feeling. oh yeah gimme more, and ull see how strong I am. haha. well lately, I been thinking too much, I finally realized how important my friends are,and like they're the only ones who could help me through whatever, and there are people who you expect the most to be there for you,they will just push you away, and they're just nice if they need suim from you, I guess I was just too nice, bcuhs I don't really want them to be upset or any negative feeling.and I helluh forgot about myself now. Now playing: Moving on -Toya "See right when I start letting go Somebody wants to let me know Can they take your place No they can't fill your space " it is not easy to let go of someone who has been really close to your heart, even if you force yourself to let it go? it just wouldn't, the heart has a mind of its own, the heart knows when to let go and when's the right time to love somebody else, the only answer that I found is that: it takes time, don't rush it, it will eventually get to that point. Im not gonna lie, I can't wait to get there, bcuhs its a burden deep inside to still have this feeling. it aint easy,like freals. but despite of that,Im trying to be happy beyond it, I don't wanna think about what happened,bcuhs its hurting me more.but whaereverss, hurt is part of love, I have my FRIENDS and them to make me happy, but yknow, it aint theee same. but its all good, atleast im happy,haha. whateverrr. I was kinda mad at myself bcuhs I let this situation get the best out of me. oh man.there's no one to blame but myself, why did I fall for the second time? ugh. knowing that the person doesn't want you anymore.why do I keep pushing myself? idont know the answer either, well this time,im not anymore.well she got her ex,I can see that she happy now. im happy for her too. haha, like my friend said "yall hella bipolar." hahahaaa but reaaally tho, got meee helllaaaa fuckeeeed up, like no otherr. anyways, this weeek wasss ahrrryttie, haha.but heyy sonics waasss good for the 2nd time. ahah. I missed hanging out with this beeezzzy. lols, I kinda felt bad for what happened between me and him, but then again,im still thankful that he was there for me through the good and bad, now that's waht im calling "real" haha. even if I pushed him away hella times, he didn't leave me, lols,whatever, still no regrett becuhs I thought things were gonna be better. but yeah, it waaaaas.it just didn't work. blaaaah, okay this is really getting emo. hahaaahaha, no goodddd. hahaha. and lol, im pretty happy with what I have ryt now, I just don't wanntt any dramas as babyboooy said.haha, lol, I missed that beezzzy too, he gave me giftcard,oh yeaaah. and dinner with my lovelys soon at Kome, omgggaah,lets go guyyssss. throwwwbackkks=) so ima end it here now,its gettinggg long like yours.mwahahhaa. and I wanna greeeet mhyk a happpy birthdaaay! "just let me spend one more minute with you." Sunday, January 3, 2010 AND AT THE END OF THE DAY, THERES STILL MISSING. she walked through her room, took off her clothes and changed with the comfortable clothes, she cleaned the mess. She felt tired, she laid down the bed. she tried to speak but the eloquence of her mind could not determine what is missing, yet slowly did she realize, she could not figure it out, because it was her heart. Her heart could only determine what’s missing. She tried trusting her mind, but it would not do any better. No matter how happy she was, she is still breaking down at the end of the day. Because YOU was missing in her heart. 1/3/09 125am i aint tryna kill ppl, you know so i think i should blog about my crazy daay, so i woke up at 6am bcuhsss i had to drop off my pops to work, he didnt use the van bc its getting fixed today. and thankGod its already fixed. and den waited for bestie cuhss she wantedd to come over again, since its the lastt dayy. and den i begged my dad if i cud use theee van kuz i really want my quicklys. and my cravinggg for calamari, and i didnt wanna take the bus to quicklys, haha, so then, i begged and begged til he gave it up. mwahah. i got ninjaa skillz. so then i picked up my frieeend, tell me why i was driving down the streett and this guy skateboarding down the hill hella fast popped outta nowhere in front of the van, i wassss hella nervous, i braked hella harrrd man. ohh gaaahh, and his skateboard bumped the bumper of the van and good thing he jumped outta skateboard. and told me “my bad” yahhh dude that was your bad, eventho ur pedestrian. i aint tryna kill ppl here,you know. man that woke the heckk outtta me thoooooo. omg, i cant get over it. and my friends was just hellaaa laughing man, while im right there,drivinggg, and still nervous from what happpened. “wait were we going? uhh stonestown? waiit go bacck! i look like shit! nooooo!” so then we went to freakin stonestown to fetch my other friend too, man we were driving round for frickeeen 10 or 15 mins tryna figure out what part of macys she was at. haha. during that 10 mins, “Bestie: How did you know i used to talk to lowell? us: HUH? Bestie: I mean chanel” AHHAHAAHAHAHAHHAAHA/ crackiiiin maaan. andd then hey,we found herrr. omgg. i was hella drving faast to go to westlake thoooe. 40 mph = speed limit. i was on 60. kuz i wanted to eat so bad. hahha. so yeah. then were at Quickly’s. HEYYYYYY! haha. 3 milk teas, and 1 chocolate snow, with small balls. haha. and uhh, can i get one calamari and 1 popcorn chickeen? oh yeaaah. im all goood. fudggee man. its so priceless. so then i dropped off my friend, bcuz she said she was gonna take a shower. haha. and den we went to my house, to eat, we chilled there and after we ate, i met my friend outside,bcuz she was kinda lost. shhaha. i had to meet her uup down my street. den i finisheddd the calamari,ohh soo good. den ssssssss. haha. we wuss just chillin because nobodyyss home. den my friend hadd to leave, bestie walked herr to the bus stop, so sweet.but no. haha den yeah,haha. we were just laughiiin and laughin. haha. we palyed wii too. but it didnt work, we ended upp just talkin.anddddd den likeee.. “sheee aiiint gonna tie mee dowwn” hahahaa. so den my other friend left too, bcuss she had to take care of sum biddness. haha. which im home alone with my bestie, we were watching some uhh. crazy scenes from our fav shoow then yeah, with her “drama” with the other gurrh. haha. then her uncle called. so we walked to her old house to see whas happenenin, but nothing really happened. and den yeah. they dropped me off home. but heeey, =) i had fun. Life is Fun, RUTH Saturday, January 2, 2010 its the first day of the year and its the first of the year, new years went by goooood, because it was actually the first time my family was complete. like this the first time spending it complete, and no ones missing. i felt happy because were actually complete now. so we went to embarcadero, or pier 39 to watch the fireworks and yes it was priceless. Now playing: When It Rains- Paramore And when it rains You always find an escape Just running away From all of the ones who love you From everything You made yourself a bed at the bottom Of the blackest hole (blackest hole) And you'll sleep till May You'll say that you don't want to see the sun anymore The feeling of getting a chance to start over again, and the feeling of letting go of the heartaches and pain, it is priceless, i know it is hard, but its one phase in your life that you have to go through. CHANGES, expect that theres gonna be more changes. more and more. but i told myself that theres gonna be better dayyys. lol. like my friend would say "You dont need that shit bruuuh" haha. i know i dont need it,but ineed YOU. haha. todayy was crackin, i went to kickit with them, and like the whole we were just laughing and laughing. haha. we haddd our random talks and i liked it. i had my first smoke. hahah. it was pretty cool kickin with these people. haha. and heeey, theyre the first people i hanged out in 2010, u guy shud feel special. haha. im jk. Anyhow, 2 days til school starts and i havent done anything. But its okay, i read the book already, the thing is i just forgot what happened in every chapter. Pricrastination will truly kill you tho, especially in AP. ha. uh i think tomorrows gonna be a busy day, and i think im gonna have the car tomorow, hopes up. wheew. "i threw all of your stuff away. then i cleared you out of my head. i tore you out my heart, and ignored all your messages. i tell everyone we are through, cuhs i'm so much better without you. but its just another pretty lie, cuhs i break down everytime you come around." Friday, January 1, 2010 indeed it was a good year Now Playing: Feeling You - T.I i dont wanna say that it was a bad year for me, because looking back through the year made me sad, because of that bad times that happened, but hey, theres also good times ya know. those priceless moments and feelings. i would never ever forget that. As i can recap, i started my 2009 very bad because of my family problems, it was very hard for me to accept it, because it is not what i expected. as far as i can remember, my lovelife was being an ass that time too. but who cares, its past. i know, but im just saying. haha. There were so numerous things that happened, i wanna enumerate it, but this its gonna take a long time. it went good for my sophomore year, but then my grades went lower, i had issues like no otherrr. but hey, my summer was crackkiin, even most of the time,i stayed home. I thank all the people who put it up with me throughout the summer tho. oh and even before that? Shit happened. Man, 2 of my bestfriends left me and went to the Philippines, it was truly heartbreaking, man. Jazmine, i missyou dude. but then again, ive learned how to face it. and i got used to, although it wasnt the same without them. I have to take it. Like going to school without them, like i was just all quiet and yeah. but good thing the school was about to end that time. and junior year came. it started out sooo bad, but it was worth it, because of the volleyball season. i made some improvements for myself, but i gotta work for it. anyways.. 2009 is the year, where i had to attend 4 debuts of my friends, like theyre leaving me too, theyre 18 and their goin to college. like sucks maaaan, i cant wait to be 18 too. haha, but hey 2010, im turning 18:) ugh, but hella ppl are graduating too.grrr. man i am already feeling the saddness of 2010 tho, but its all good tho, its in a good way too. haha. whew. anyways lets not talk about that, so hello 2009, youre about to leave me, thanks for all the memories, pains, heartaches, joy, laughters, tears and blessings. I just wanna thank the Lord above, for taking care of me this year, for helping me and for teaching me lessons. One great thing about 2009 is that I learned to Love the fact of learning from my mistakes, and to accepting whats not for me. The Lord has answered all my prayers, but its either, YES, NO or WAIT. Towards the end of the year,I had the most heartbreaking event in my life, i had the most painful pains, and i had to accept it with my pride. It is never easy to accept things, especially when its not really for you. You gotta move on, and forget the pain because theres gonna be better days. Easier said than done, but thats just how it is. Im learning to not look back from the bad things that happened, but just treasure the good memories that happened, it would keep you smiling. Forget the past, keep good times, theres more to come. I never thought i would actually feel this kind of pain in my heart,i never thought that it would end this way, sorry i have my imperfections in my life, and sorry i made a mistake for letting that relationship slipped just like that. i wasnt thinking right at all.but hey, youre one the best things that happened to me, im not gonna lie. thanks for everything and sorrryy. I wanna end this year very positive, although its not ending right for me, but i just wanna think positive for now, so it will be good for me the next year. 2010 is jsut a few hours away.I just wanted to let go of the heartaches,pain and all the negative stuffs that i been through this year, especially for this month. ohhh december. :( man this is harrrd, i feel like crying. i gotta let this out before 2010 comes at 12. well idk if theres gonna be tears, im pretty there will be, although ive shed alot this year. whew. Keep drinking water. haha. it will keep you alive. Thaks you Lord, Parents and Friends for being there for me, for putting it up with me, and for not giving up on me. Sorry for all the bad stuff that i have done.I am very sorry. Lets make 2010 great, yeah? lets apply the things that we have learned from 2009. IM pretty sure everybodys gonna be happy. Lets make each other smile and keep that smile in our face, enough with the tears. Keep Moving Forward and Dont look back with the bad times:) I love you all. thankyou:) Now Playing: Must Be Nice- Lyfe Jennings
But baby, where they knock you down and out Is where you oughta stay